Feminist February: Vic + Flo Saw a Bear (But Only Metaphorically)

Third film of Feminist February with the somewhat misleadingly titled Vic + Flo Saw a Bear.  I don’t know where to begin with this one.  Really I don’t.

I am positive Christa has much to say about this week’s pick.

The Film:

Vic + Flo Saw a Bear

The Premise:

Lesbian ex-cons move to small-town Canada, which is quite beautiful and has fewer bears than anticipated. Except in the metaphorical sense.

The Uncondensed Version:

The titular Vic arrives in a small town in Quebec, already ruffling feathers as she insults a trumpet-playing child. I really connected with her at that moment.

As it turns out, Vic has recently been released from prison. She plans to live with her uncle, who is now paralyzed and cannot speak. Fortunately, Uncle Emile has a caretaker in the form of this teen boy who likes to fly a remote control helicopter and avoid wearing a shirt. (Does it really get that hot in Quebec?!)

This is part of a plan to fool her parole officer, Guillaume, into thinking she lives with her brother. Guillaume is pretty much not fooled, but he lets Vic get away with a lot of shit.

Pretty adorable for a parole officer.

Vic spends quite a bit of time cruising around with that teen boy in a golf cart, saying grumpy things to the PO, and inexplicably crying.

It’s not too long before Flo arrives and completes the duo. Vic and Flo are quite sweet initially, but their differences are heading towards irreconcilable. Flo is a younger, free-spirited city dweller who longs for excitement, while Vic would be perfectly content to stay holed up in the woods and never see another living human being.

YES.

Sadly, this is not to be, as a woman working for the city shows up and seems to be flirting with Vic. She helps Vic tend to her garden and, in exchange, asks to use the property as a shortcut occasionally. Vic agrees because, hey, what could possibly go wrong?

Meanwhile, Flo, whose sexuality is a bit more fluid, goes to the only bar in town to pick up guys. Also to drink, but probably like 60-75% to pick up guys.

So not the healthiest relationship ever. Things go from bad to worse when Guillaume tells Vic that her uncle Emile really needs better care. She manages to hang on to some of his money that she found hidden in the house, which Flo interprets as a way to keep and control her. Vic, on the other hand, sees it as a romantic gesture even though she follows it with the line “I’ll kill myself if you leave.” Whoaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa, ease up a bit on the emotional manipulation, please.

Cruisin’

Everything spirals out of control when the lady who has been helping Vic with the garden turns out to be Jackie, a woman with a vendetta against Flo. After she ties Flo to a tree and breaks her leg, Flo insists Jackie has gotten her revenge and will absolutely, definitively NOT return.

Look at her face…she’s obviously just kidding around.

I would just like to point out that this is (obviously) horribly, horribly wrong and the kind of person who ties you to a tree and breaks your leg will ALWAYS be back. Lest I completely ruin this one, let’s leave it there and say this film takes a very dark turn.

The Rating:

3/5 Pink Panther Heads

Personally, it drives me nuts that many questions are left unanswered at the end of this film.  Unless I missed all of the answers while typing my notes.

First, any sort of explanation for Jackie’s behavior. Presumably Flo owes her money or betrayed her in some way? Jackie’s motives are deliberately ambiguous as she is the force of nature, the “bear” in this film, and it’s not important why she behaves the way she does. It seems to be inherent in her nature.

On a related note, the reason for Vic’s incarceration and Flo hiding for 10 years. Money? Idk, you guys—the only institution who I’ve borrowed large sums of money from is the government. And I don’t think the US federal government has reached the stage of tying people to trees and breaking their knees. YET. My point is that Jackie’s motives seemed more personal, but it remains unclear what she wanted…except to hurt Flo.

The last half of this movie was much stronger than the first…and it would have been stronger if there had been, I don’t know, SOME FUCKING ANSWERS.

I found Vic and Flo compelling but not particularly sympathetic. I completely loved the parole officer, while Vic was scary controlling at times, and Flo incredibly self-destructive.

Worth a watch, but be prepared for the lack of literal/non-metaphorical bears.

Did Christa see a bear or is she out in the wilderness regarding this film?  Does that question even make sense?  Find out the answer to at least one of those questions by reading her review here!

Antisocial, Not a Description of This Blogger (For Once)

Horror Month, part 3! This week’s film is Christa’s pick. Do I really have to tell you where to find her excellent review? Here. It’s here.

The Film:

Antisocial

The Premise:

A zombie plague spreads very politely through social media in Canada.

The Uncondensed Version:

First of all, on a scale of 1 to Canadian, this movie is really fucking Canadian.

Instances of the word “aboot” instead of “about”: 86,357

Number of sweaters worn: 5,114

Apologies: countless

I guess you might want to know more about this film than that. Right? Maybe?

So there are these teen vloggers who have this sort of fashion vlog (I’ll stop using that word now, Christa). It all seems to be going rather swimmingly and one of them even looks like a character from Orphan Black, so I’m already on board. However, one suddenly attacks the other, who commits violent murder in self-defense.

Cut to Sam, who dresses exactly like Sarah from Orphan Black but with less eyeliner. Or maybe it’s just the way Canadians dress? It’s the same old storyline but via Skype: she’s pregnant, her boyfriend wants to take a break. Sick of this shit, Sam deletes a thinly disguised version of Facebook, the Social Red Room (which is a terrible name for a social media platform).

Welcome to Clone Club.

Obviously with no social media to share her fabulous New Year’s plans on, Sam opts for pity party over party with friends. However, her friends have other plans and decide to throw a party at her place. There’s a lot of drinking, social media-ing, and burning of sparklers in the house (which is extremely unsafe and I do not condone).

YOU’RE GOING TO BURN THE HOUSE DOWN. IN THE LITERAL SENSE.

Everyone seems to be having a nice time until Jed, social media guru and Most Likely to Have Paranoid Conspiracy Theory to Explain Everything, starts tracking multiple updates about what is basically a zombie plague. Zombie people break up the party because obv they do, and 9-1-1 gives essentially a keep calm and carry on message.

The remainder of the film is Sam and her friends trapped inside, getting the virus one by one. Coincidentally, getting trapped at a party and not being able to leave is one of my phobias. Death by zombie plague would be a relief, honestly.

Other things that happen in this film:

1. One of the characters gets a call from an unknown number and picks up; I call bullshit. Everyone knows you let that shit go to voicemail b/c it’s probably someone trying to tell you you’ve won a cruise.
2. Jed loses his shit.
3. One of the characters gets zombified and dies by hanging…from Christmas lights (I’m not nuts about Christmas either).

Guys, I just didn’t really get into this one, plus I’m having…not my favorite Monday ever. The sort of “social media will kill us all” theme felt kind of tired to me and just annoyed me. Will it? Will it really?

Am I too much of a millennial? IDGAF. I am who I am.

Ready for sleep. Seacrest out.

The Rating:

 3/5 Pink Panther Heads

Compare with Christa’s notes here!