Atomic Falafel, or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Noms

Appropriately for March Madness, this week’s film is about what happens when petty, short-sighted megalomaniacs control frighteningly destructive weapons in ways that are in no way reflective of the reality we currently live in.

The Film:

Atomic Falafel

The Premise:

With Iran and Israel on the brink of nuclear war, it’s up to two teen girls, a hacker, a German, and a falafel truck to save the world.

The Ramble:

Present-day Israel.  Secret underground bunker.  Scale model of the desert with…toy planes?  Though all of the elements of a spy thriller are there (including sinister eye patches and intimidating beards), it’s clear early on that the men assembled are a bunch of bumbling fools.  Unfortunately, they may be just unhinged enough to end life on Earth as we know it.

You know you’re one of the good guys if you have an eye patch AND well-groomed facial hair.

Convinced of Iran’s plans to unleash nuclear war, the Israeli military decides they must strike first with their own secret nuclear weapons.  The catch?  They have only a matter of days to strike, and must first survive a visit from a UN-type committee examining their nuclear facilities.  The plan is to fool the inspectors and then proceed to annihilating Iran (and likely a significant chunk of other countries in the process).

Ha ha ha…ha?

Since we’ve taken care of the “atomic” part of the title, on to the falafel.  Mimi and her teenage daughter, Nofar, run a falafel truck whose main business comes from following the military around during maneuvers and offering the only meal option for miles around.  Pretty nifty strategy.

Gilmore Girls I guess?  But with falafel?

Helping with the business is taking a toll on Nofar, who is falling behind in class,  letting her short temper get the best of her, and making no progress with her cautious hacker boyfriend.  In an effort to distract Mimi from her daughter’s shortcomings, Nofar is determined to set her up with a new man.

Enter Oli, stage right–the German member of the visiting committee and, coincidentally, the only moderately good looking one.  After Mimi’s overly spicy food sends Oli to the hospital, he conveniently recovers at her house.  While Mimi and Oli bond, they are unaware that the Israeli government wants Oli out ASAP, even attempting to blackmail Mimi into persuading him to leave.

The fist bump:  a universal symbol of human bonding.

Meanwhile, Nofar has befriended Sharareh, a teen girl who has recently moved to a small town in Iran.  Initially trying to get help with her family tree project, Nofar really connects with Sharareh and discovers she’s an aspiring rapper.

And has a pretty sweet recording studio set up in her room.

It just gets even more bananas from here on out, with government officials hacking into Nofar’s Facebook account in an attempt to humiliate her.  She gets the last laugh when a CD with important codes falls into her hands.  That is, until she realizes that just as Israel plans to strike in a matter of days, Iran will do the same.  Worse, Israel will strike Sharareh’s hometown.

How will this group of meddling kids prevent nuclear disaster when they’re the only ones acting like adults?

The Rating:

3.5/5 Pink Panther Heads

Taking many cues from Dr. Strangelove, this film is a fun, silly romp.  I half expected several characters to tear off their masks to reveal Peter Sellers.  However, this is significantly more optimistic with some moments of very dark humor and absurd satire.

This may also be the most positive depiction of social media I’ve ever seen on screen.  Facebook and even this sort of Chatroulette type thing where Nofar and Sharareh meet have the power to bring people together across difference here, rather than devolving into the usual festering mass of extremist hate groups we all know and love.

I should’ve jumped on this film when it came out as it would’ve been funnier 3 years ago–or really at any point when the US leadership wasn’t threatening other unhinged narcissists with annihilation every other week.

I honestly do believe if anything can bring us world peace, it’s falafel.

Would my Queen of Falafel go back for seconds or push the big red button instead?  Read her review here to find out!

Under the Shadow, or: Djinn and Tonic (Sorry)

It’s October, our favorite month on the blog!  Besides all of the other months.  October is always like coming full circle to our first collaborative posts on Ginger Snaps.  Never fear–there will be plenty of questionable special effects and metaphors for puberty later this month.  First, we’re kicking things off with a more sinister horror that dials up the suspense.

The Film:

Under the Shadow

The Premise:

A woman in 1980s Tehran suspects the Iran-Iraq War isn’t the only thing to fear when creepy things start happening in her apartment.

The Ramble:

After failing to gain re-acceptance into med school, Shideh finds it difficult to contain her resentment of her family–husband Iraj and daughter Dorsa.  Because of her politics during the 1979 Revolution, Shideh is essentially blacklisted from the university.  Most discouraging of all is her mother’s recent death, which has given Shideh the final push to complete her studies and achieve their shared dream.

Unfortunately, it’s too late for Shideh to become a doctor, which her doctor husband is pretty ok with TBH.  The tension between the two is always simmering below the surface and boils over pretty frequently.  Sometimes Shideh finds herself snapping at her daughter too as she feels she was too quick to start a family.

All of this is happening in the ongoing Iran-Iraq War, which draws closer to Tehran every day.  It won’t be long before Iraj must serve his country at the heart of the fighting, leaving Shideh and Dorsa to worry about the threat of missiles and maybe even spirits haunting the apartment building.

The first and last time anyone in this film smiles.

Dorsa insists she can see and hear things in the apartment that she suspects are djinn.  Fun fact:  a djinn is apparently a lot different from what I thought it was.  In this film, the djinn is sort of a ghost or breeze that floats in.  Horrifyingly, Dorsa seems to be getting these stories from the creepy neighbor kid…who also happens to be mute.  Me.  Out of there.  Immediately.

If the supernatural elements weren’t stressful enough, the anxiety meter gets cranked up when missiles target Tehran, even striking the apartment building itself.  Shideh tries to save a neighbor who has a heart attack in response, but bitterly reflects she’s not really a doctor.

No pressure, but that missile could also explode at any point during CPR.

After the missile scare, many of the neighbors leave.  Shideh, however, refuses to leave–partly because the last thing she wants to do is rely on her in-laws.  This woman is made of sterner stuff than I because she experiences something trying to choke her in the night, the destruction of her beloved Jane Fonda workout tape, strange sounds, and the disappearance of Dorsa’s doll.  The last part is especially troubling as one of the neighbors (helpfully) tells Shideh she’s screwed if the djinn possesses something of hers.

Meanwhile, the air raid sirens have been sounding more and more frequently, prompting Shideh’s decision to finally leave Tehran with Dorsa.  First, they must navigate an accusation of indecency when Shideh flees during an air raid without wearing a hijab.  For fuck’s sake, men.

In times of crisis, at least we can rely on men to consistently act like assholes.

Added complication:  Shideh must find the doll before she and Dorsa can leave.  It doesn’t help that Dorsa keeps saying heart-stopping things about a lady who has the doll and says she can take care of her.

Which will Shideh and Dorsa encounter first:  the doll, the missiles, or the djinn?

The Rating:

4.5/5 Pink Panther Heads

I loved this one–so damn creepy and suspenseful.  Though it’s a fairly short film, my heart was pounding through its entire run time.  Having both the threat of war and supernatural phenomena was effective in creating tension that had me genuinely concerned about our two main characters.

Speaking of our main characters, I enjoyed the realistic relationship between mother and daughter.  Shideh got frustrated with her daughter regularly and frequently seemed to fail to be patient or sympathetic.  I never had the sense that their relationship was easy (Shideh was, after all, raising a daughter by herself in the midst of war, broken dreams, and angry spirits), but it felt strong throughout and grounded the film.

Word of warning–if you have the option to watch the dubbed version, don’t do it.  Netflix defaulted to some of the worst English dubbed dialogue, and I switched over to subtitled Farsi almost immediately.  It’s much more convincing.

Would Christa tape this one back together like a broken doll or kill it with fire?  Find out by reading her review here!

A Girl Walks Home Alone at Night, or: I Can Take Your Eyes out of Your Skull

Foreign films, round two. This one is Christa’s pick.

I’m not even going to try to create any sort of suspense here; I loved this film (spoiler spoiler spoiler).

See what Christa thought here!

The Film:

A Girl Walks Home Alone at Night

Where to Watch:

Netflix (US)

The Premise:

I saw a review describing this as the first Iranian vampire western. I would also argue it is the first (only?) feminist vampire movie. With a cat.

The Trailer:

The Uncondensed Version:

There’s a cat in this film, and it’s actually pretty important to the (admittedly not overly involved) plot. I was initially afraid this was going to get all Gummo, but don’t worry—nothing bad happens to the cat. (I guess that’s a spoiler, but whatever. If you’re the kind of person who doesn’t care what happens to the cat at the end, you deserve to have all film endings spoiled. Probably).

The cat seriously deserves an Oscar for the range of emotions on its face.

So our protagonist is Arash, a young man who works hard but keeps getting caught up in his father’s nonsense and the general shittiness of living in Bad City. His father is a junkie, gambler, and owes a lot of money to this super shady pimp/loan shark/not 100% sure what his job description is. Whatever he does for a living, he’s a total douche as exhibited by (a) threatening the fucking cat, (b) his “SEX” neck tattoo, and (c) taking Arash’s car as payment for his father’s debts.

It’s okay, readers. This tool doesn’t have long to live. He makes his last mistake by kicking a prostitute to the curb without payment for services rendered. Sketchy dudes of Bad City, beware: you never know who or what is watching you. Spoiler alert: vampire. Totally a vampire. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand she kills him.

Later, in what is possibly my favorite moment of the entire film, the vampire threatens to feed a little boy’s eyes to dogs, then steals his skateboard.

Have I ever told you you’re my heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeero?

It may not surprise you that Arash meets the vampire one night. He is leaving a costume party dressed as a vampire and has just taken E or something…I don’t know, guys. I have little to no street cred. Whatever he took, it makes one particular streetlamp absolutely fascinating to him, apparently. The vampire approaches him, and he then wraps her in his cape because she feels cold. Then she pushes him on the skateboard to her place. Honestly, this scene was about 10,000x more adorable than I can convey here. They also have basically the most tension-filled non-sex scene ever.

Oh my god, just make out already. Now. …Now. …NOW.

When they meet again later, Arash brings the vampire a hamburger; if that’s not love, I don’t know what is. He also gives her stolen earrings and pierces her ears with a safety pin…awwwwwwwww?

The Critique:

Okay, I think she’s the first feminist vampire, and this may be the first feminist vampire movie. Correct me if I’m wrong. I’m not an expert because I think vampires are just not scary at all and have to follow a lot of arbitrary rules. Plus lady vampires usually have to be “sexy” vampires, which is just so infuriating.

Straight talk: this is a majorly hipster-y movie; the vampire listens to music on a record player, has a disco ball in her room, and I think I spotted Michael Jackson on the wall. And sometimes this movie is really bizarre; there’s this scene of a woman dancing with a balloon to sort of operatic music. I’m still puzzling over that one.

However, this is a gorgeous film, part love story, part story of bringing justice to Bad City. So…Iranian vampire western. Accurate. (To be honest, I was thinking of Rango the whole time and expecting the little owl mariachi band to appear at any moment.) Much more of a creepy/suspenseful film than a gory horror.

The director’s next project is apparently “a post-apocalyptic cannibal love story set in a Texas wasteland” where a “muscled cannibal breaks the rule ‘don’t play with your food.” Ana Lily Amirpour, WHERE have you been all my life???

The Rating:

 5/5 Pink Panther Heads

We’re doing it; we’re going with a perfect score. I don’t mean to say this is a perfect film that is completely free of WTF moments, but it was original, it was creepy, it was tense, and it had a cat. As close to perfection as possible.

Christa’s review is available here!